Finding your place in a relationship - The role of emotions

Finding your place within a private or professional relationship is sometimes complicated. For fear of rejection, or possible consequences there is a hesitation to assert oneself. Asserting oneself means expressing one's opinion, asking questions, saying no or proposing another solution.

Sometimes people don't say anything because they don't know how to do it.

They do not feel equipped to communicate effectively and calmly.

Some also don't know exactly what they want.

Fear, lack of tools or of clarity are elements that generate discomfort and stress.

Over time, when this situation is repeated, it has an impact on self-confidence.

Some have this difficulty in the professional context, others in private relationships and sometimes in both.

The first step to solving the problem is to reconnect with yourself, your emotions, needs and desires.

This is starting to change, but for a long time emotions have had bad press.

Showing or expressing emotions was seen as a weakness.

However, they are there and have an important role.

If they are not welcomed and named, they are either repressed or expressed inappropriately.

A child to whom a parent said , "Don't cry" held back his tears.

At that time the child needed listening, comfort or reassurance.

Sometimes a child holds back tears because he feels that his parentis not available or himself in a difficult situation that he does not know how to handle; so the child keeps his sadness to himself so as not to disturb. If it happens once in a while, it doesn't cause a problem. No parent is available and fit all the time.

My purpose is certainly not to look for a culprit, it is just explanatory.